Dearest Charles and Beth
I use to believe that if I planned out my life, tried hard enough, worked hard enough and treated people the way I wanted to be treated, we and those we love would be safe from anything bad. I know I wrestled with the fact that life is not always fair. I often wondered why bad things happened to good people. Even though I did not always have the answers, I always held onto the fact that at least we had each other.
Somehow my anxiety clouded up my vision for such a long time (30 years). My once positive thoughts were taken over by negative ones. Life didn’t make any sense. I would go through some good times, but most of the times were doom and gloom. On the outside my life looked all “peaches and cream”, but no one knew the fear I felt inside. My once stable life turned into the “roller coaster from hell”.
Jenny summed it up quite nicely in a couple of words “Your world becomes very small when you suffer with anxiety”. I must also add that your family’s world becomes smaller too. I always could handle my life being this way. But, boy oh boy, how I struggled with the thought of Donna, Samantha and Tristan not being able to enjoy all life has to offer because of me. And I know from my short consultation with Charles that his family is everything to him. So I am sure he can certainly relate to where I am coming from. My father has a saying I heard many times. “You can do whatever you want to me and get away with it, but don’t ever mistreat my wife or kids or you are going to get it with both barrels.”
Needless to say that for many years I was not the same person on the inside as I “acted” on the outside. I was just like a robot going through the motions. My anxiety had consumed my entire life and was starting to consume my family too. Consequently, I looked everywhere for the answer. It was actually not until I looked at my faith that I realized that I was being pulled in this direction. It was just a simple kind of faith, one that somehow, someway, this suffering would end, good would be rewarded, love would endure, pain would be forgotten, light would shatter darkness and my spirit would go on.
I firmly believe that my prayers were answered with my spirit being drawn to the both of you.
I wish I had a new, more eloquent way to say “thank you”, a way that would truly express how very much your kindness has meant to me. You both possess a special gift in the way you touch lives, of making days much brighter, hearts finding joy and problems diminishing. You helped to bring my spirit back to life! You both are a wonderful gift to me, and my life is so much better because I know you.
Charles, during our chat you mentioned that if you had to do it all over again, you would have pursued becoming a doctor. While most doctors specialize in medicine, in my opinion I believe that you specialize in healing. Before even asking, you already understand your client’s problems and needs. It is very apparent that you help others because you genuinely want to help. You find joy through your kindness and, in turn, your priority is to help others find their own happiness once again. You make this world a better place by practicing the art of reaching out to others and by giving from the heart. Your impact is just as valuable, if not more valuable than any doctor! May the happiness you bring to others come back to you twofold because you deserve that and so much more.
Beth, it is rare that someone comes along who just naturally makes everyone feel a little happier and a little more alive. Without having to even say a word, your cheerful presence is more than enough. Your unique quality is that of being so genuine, so real. You have had that kind of impact on me.
You have both given me a new perspective on a whole lot of things – including myself. There are things you have said to me that I will always remember and the ways that you have helped me will remain unforgettable. Although we were only together a short time, the experience that I had has left me only looking forward to the next time.
Many, many thanks for being the wonderful people that you are. You are both such an inspiration to me that I can’t tell you enough how very happy and grateful I am that you have come into my life.